When I woke up this morning, I was sure it would only be 2 or 3 am and I would still have at least 3 hours of sleep left but then I looked at the time and saw it was 6.30 am already. I did not feel motivated at all, again. I did not have a good night’s sleep because the family I live with had to be up late and noisy as they so often are. When I went up to the kitchen just a while ago to make myself my first cup of coffee, I noticed that one of them was sleeping on the couch – so that also didn’t help me with starting my day in a good way (I actually need part of the upstairs area to prepare chicken and pigeon food mixes in the morning and this is really hard to do when someone is sleeping next to that area).
Today, I wonder how other people motivate themselves to get up in the morning and do their work. How they got over the dark periods in their life when there seemed to positive outcome possible. And what do people like Patrick Stewart, Ian McKellen or Lucy Lawless do when they wake up with no hope in their heart? I guess, people like that don’t really have so many problems with motivation as they are surrounded by loving people and have millions of people who believe in them. They have many, many goals and they have the power to make them come true.
For me, just one loving person who believes in what I do would be enough for me. Someone else (but me) who thinks I can do everything I believe in. Someone who supports me. I’ve dreamed of such a friend or even mentor since I was a child. When I saw movies in which the main characters find a mentor, a teacher or even a spirit to guide them, it always gave me hope that this would happen to me one day, too. It didn’t. I even went out looking for those people in various places.
I know, people will say that I can be my own friend and mentor – but I guess those people do not know what it is like to never have supporters for your biggest dreams. Do you know what it’s like to keep on going through life without real support? By now, I almost have given up on it. I guess, that plays a big part in my lack of motivation in the mornings.
Where is my Captain Picard? My Captain Janeway? My Gabrielle, my Mister Miyagi or my Gandalf?