After a few weeks during which I was not sure about whether it been had a good idea to come to this place and during which there were problems with other people (and of course the chicken issue), I actually asked whether I could stay longer.
Once the bullies were gone, and the chickens are now reasonably save, everything started to look brighter. I could finally truly enjoy what I was/am doing (which is everything that has to do with organic gardening on a medium-sized scale, from planting to weeding, picking and packing veggies). Of course, there are jobs I don’t like that much, but most of the time I am quite happy with what I have to do. I also learn a lot, and for that I am quite grateful.
I also finally got to work with some of the “native” workers, i.e. the native speakers, the people who actually live in Scotland and won’t just move away again in some weeks’ time. There are two people I truly like and would love to have as friends – however, I know that this will not happen, so I have to keep my feelings reasonably hidden. At least I can talk to them during work every now and then. One of them is only here every now and then and hardly ever works in a team with me, and the other is a bit intimidating. But when proper conversations happen, they are really good. Sometimes philosophical and meaningful, and at other times plain silly because we share some interests and can make fun of each other without insulting anyone. But unfortunately, these conversations don’t happen often.
Last weekend, I went on a longer walk to a place that supposedly had many seagulls (but they turned out to be a colony of Kittiwakes, a bird I’ve never seen before and now just love!). Another volunteer worker went with me, and I get along with her quite well. However, she’ll be going back into her own country after the main season is over – so there is no chance for a proper long term friendship, and I think we’re too different in some aspects anyway.
I think my main issue with things here is that everything feels temporary and that people often just see me as one more wwoofer. You can get the label “good wwoofer”, “bad wwoofer”, and maybe “average wwoofer”. But that’s about it. For most people here, I am just a temporary worker, someone they will soon forget. And of course someone like that would not be considered as a potential friend.
However, I really like this area. I can imagine actually living here. But so far I haven’t talked about this with anyone – because whom would I talk to about something like that? I guess that’s what this blog is good for.